City of Palms Charter High School - Blog

Blog # 3: The Nature Of Dreams

Fri, 22 May 2020 15:27:28 GMT

Some students and teachers have reported having bad dreams or nightmares during this time of ongoing stress. First of all that’s, normal during abnormal times. Our routines have been changed and so our dreams are changed. The nature of stress dreams are usually shorter than dreams in regular times and can be intense or frightening or just strange and puzzling. The Egyptians thought that dreams were messages from the Gods; the Greeks thought that dreams were messages from the dead. I’d like to remind you that dreams are usually no more than our subconscious mind reacting to the events of that day. Our mind is trying to file away important memories of today and to short out what everything meant to us today. The mind files some things in important folders of our memories and trashes or files other things in the back of our minds in less important files. Dreams are not warnings of things to come such as sudden, unexpected deaths or winning the lottery next weekend, etc. They are just our reactions to recent events.

Some students are mentioning violent or gory dreams. These usually have to do with feelings of not being able to control upsetting information and feeling helpless to do anything about it. They represent our fear of what is going on in the world and what will happen to us next. Some people believe that they never dream, but this is not the case. We all dream most every night that we achieve a deep sleep. There are a few things you can do about dreams that are waking you up with uneasy feelings. Just after you close your eyes to fall asleep, tell yourself you will NOT remember your dreams in the morning, or you can say to yourself that you will only remember pleasant thoughts. Try to think of the type of dreams or visions you want to have. This may take several nights before you see a difference, but keep it up until you have the types of dreams you want or just don’t remember any dreams at all.

I have been encouraged lately that most people’s bad dreams are getting fewer and less traumatic and their overall mood is lighter than just a couple of weeks ago as we see signs of slightly better reports on the news. However, I have to stress again that you should limit your exposure to the news media. One hour a day should be you media exposure to the reports of the virus and the statistics. 30 minutes of the world news & 30 minutes of local news per day is maximum. You can find out everything you need to know in those summaries and the rest is just speculation. Remember that sensational and shocking things that come across your computer or cell phone are usually not true even if they sound real and make for drama when you repeat them by sending them on to others.

No matter how bored, scared, or worried you get, remind yourself, “This is temporary. This is not my life, only a part of my life.” “All of this is temporary.”

Thank you for listening,
Dr. Crawford
Counselor

Dealing With on-going stress

Wed, 22 Apr 2020 15:30:56 GMT

We have all had time to settle in and adjust to the, “New Normal”. The term worries me a bit since I don’t choose to think of any of this as normal. However, know that your feelings are shared by most people and your reactions to these events are indeed normal. You may feel that you are handling these events pretty well by now, but some signs of long-term or on-going stress can surface in many unexpected ways. For example, stressing about the COVID19 virus can lead to a lower immune system function ironically making you more susceptible to viruses and colds. We all know that stress can lead to irritability and relationship problems. While most crimes have lowered during this “lock down” times, domestic violence such as child abuse and spousal abuse have risen. Feeling a sudden urge to cry at any given time for both men & women with no apparent trigger can also be a sign that you are under stress. Don’t worry about this as it is a normal reaction to prolonged stress and does not indicate that you have a permanent problem. Take a deep breath, yawn, blink your eyes, etc. and again remind yourself that this is all temporary. Other signs of stress can surface such as waking from sleep at night and feeling hot as if the air conditioner is not working or waking with a fast heartbeat or trouble catching your breath. You can experience these attacks during waking hours as well. Sleeping too little or too much are signs of depression, eating too much or too little, new aches or pains, headaches, weakness or feeling unusually tired, etc.
What to do about the stress is more important than the symptoms. The stress relievers are not dramatic or exciting. They are actually pretty mundane and simple. Exercise is one we already know and don’t really want to hear about or we would already be doing that. Just taking a couple of walks around the block is good enough and can get you a change of environment or participating in an exercise program on TV. The simplest form of stress relief is meditation or breathing exercises. Sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes (or not) and breath in, counting from 1 to 4, breath out slowly and try to count from one to 5, if possible. Do this at least 3 to 5 times or more. If you concentrate to feel the air pass over your nostrils, it helps. These techniques don’t make a huge difference right away, but the repetition of such practices will make them work better and better for you. I recommended to you in my last blog that you use the app called, “Calm”, to help with a 3 minute relaxation during the day and an ‘adult bedtime story’. Again, at first you might listen to the whole story the first couple of nights, but after a while you will start drifting off to sleep sooner and sooner each night as soon as the speaker starts talking. Remember that repetition is the key to meditation or relaxation practices. Trying them once and giving up does very little good.
Remind yourself that this is not “your life”, but only a “part” of your life. Say to yourself in times of stress, “this is temporary”, this is not permanent and this will pass. Things will be better. One phrase form Psalms comes to mind, “Weeping endureth for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.” There will be a new morning; you will look back and realize that you lived through a historical challenge in time and made it to the other side.

Covid 19 Blog 1

Wed, 25 Mar 2020 19:29:22 GMT

We know that we are facing a new challenge that has not been seen before in my 67 year history, but know that you are up to the challenge and beyond this. You have heard the precautions repeatedly, so you know to wash your hands every few hours for 20 seconds and keep 6 feet away from others. Some other advice I have to give is to also socially distance yourself form social media. Watch the news for an hour day or less. Do not park yourself in front of CNN or FOX news all day or leave it running in the back ground constantly. This will only add to your fear. Do not dwell on sensational info on your computer or cellphone as some of the most exciting news may be false or exaggerated. Stress can actually lower your immune system.

Many people are in a state of near panic and feel as if their life is out of control. You still do have control over many things such as following the CDC guidelines and continuing to do things that you enjoy, such as reading, gaming, taking a walk around the block, etc. Exercise is one of the biggest stress relievers. Whatever you enjoy doing try to change it up. You should follow a daily schedule like going to bed and getting up about the same time each day and setting aside some time each day for different activities.   For example it is a good time to pull some weeds in the yard and work outside for an hour or so. You parents will love it and you will get out from under them for a while when you are outside. LOL Then you can go back to the gaming or watching TV or whatever. Make sure to set aside a specific amount of time next week for your class work. You will be able to finish credits on-line and Florida has taken away the requirement to pass the state Reading and Alg. 1 test for this year ! So now you can graduate with a standard diploma without having to pass the tests for this year as long as your class credits are done by the end of this school year. Take advantage and get your credits finished now. Next year this opportunity will probably not be available.

From Charles Dickens’ novel, “A Tale of Two Cities, we hear, “It was the best of times; it was the worst of times.” We are so lucky to get to spend more time with our close family members and yet it can get too close for comfort.   Realize that some people substitute arguing and drama for something constructive to do. Don’t let arguing and drama with your siblings or parents become a substitute for constructive activity. Remember that no one can drive you crazy unless you give them the keys.   When 2 people are playing tennis or ping pong, they hit the ball back and forth to each other. What happens if one person does not hit the ball back, - - - the game is over! No matter what someone in your home says to you, you can take charge by saying nothing back. If you know the comment is false, then let it be false by saying nothing. Eventually the other person will know to move on to a new target.
As Mark Twain said, “The best way to cheer yourself u is to try to cheer somebody else up.”
Another quick reminder: shopping on-line can be and instant gratifications and the anticipation of the package’s arrival may be an distraction, but when this is over the bills have to be paid; Same goes for renting movies on-line, they add up fast to big expenses.
Things to think about:

1.       Connect with the earth around you, walk outdoors, ride a bike, or just go out each afternoon and sit and watch the sunset or create a flower bed or garden space next to your house.

2.       Read or listen to a book, check out the “Audible” website. For the next 2 months they have free books to listen to. It’s usually about $15 per month but is free to students now: stories.audible.com

3.       Take a relaxation break for 5 or 10 minutes per day. I recommend the app. “Calm.”   There is a daily calm for a few minutes each day and at night there is a bed time story for adults read by a soft voice that will put you to sleep. The more you use it to go to sleep the more it works. You need to go to sleep with soothing thoughts in your head: www.calm.com/<http://www.calm.com/>

4.       Be relaxed and calm, it is not usually what happens to us that is the problem, it is how we react to events that can create a problem.

If you are having difficulties coping with the situation, remember you can look on the back of your health insurance card for a customer service number and call for an appointment with a therapist. Nowadays therapy is free or has a very inexpensive copay with most insurance companies.

Other help numbers:
Dr. Russ Crawford: 239-296-7088, preferably between the hours of 8:00 am to 4:30 pm, Mondays to Thursday, anytime if you feel you are in real & immediate need.

Suicide & Crisis help: 239-275-4242, call 24/7, walk-in help 9am to 1:00 pm 2789 Ortiz Ave., Ft. Myers, Ruth Cooper center.
Keep Calm Through COVID19 866-310-7977
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 800-273-8255
888-692-9355 or text: Well665173